why I "quit" eharmony

I know that an update is long overdue, and I will get to it eventually. For now, I figured I'd post this email I just received from an eharmony wooer I started communicating with over gmail right before I "quit" eharmony (ok, I didn't "quit" so much as I let my subscription lapse, but for some reason I feel compelled to call it "quitting"). We'll call this guy "berry guy" since he works for driscoll farms. I must admit, I love their raspberries and blueberries, and find it fascinating that his job is international marketing for the blueberry division, which allows him to travel to places like Chile ... but other than thinking, "what a super cool job!" I'm not that intrigued by this guy. Granted, we had nice email exchanges that covered a wide variety of topics (including Obama winning the Nobel prize, which he asked my opinion about and I gave him, and which I don't think he agreed with), but I felt like he was trying way too hard. By that I mean that he appeared to be trying too hard to come off as a world-traveler and empathetic to humanity and into living life just to live it and shit. Maybe the fact that I don't feel that way everyday makes me a bad person, but hey - I am what I am, and unfortunately I have to take care of my own crap, which means doing as much as I can in the rat race I'm currently stuck in.

Anyway, I didn't email him back a few weeks ago because we were exchanging these looooooooong emails and I didn't have time that week. He later wrote me on a Friday night asking for a last minute coffee or drink date on Saturday night, but I wasn't in town. I wrote back and apologized a few days later, but then I caught up with work and other things, and have yet to draft a novella in response to his last email. If I were interested, I'm sure I would have; however, his lengthy, slightly arrogant (?) emails, the fact that he lives a few hours away, and my personal opinion that he wasn't all that cute in his photos, resulted in me just putting it off. I suppose I had already decided I wasn't interested. I certainly didn't mean to be rude or ignore him, but time just got away from me. I suppose that's why today he sent me this:

Hey Blaire,


Hope you've had a good, if probably hectic, last couple of weeks. Gotta say it's too bad you let this go. I was looking forward to cooking dinner with you, testing those vaunted skills of yours. Anyhow, I used to let things fade away, but now try not to...so it was really was a pleasure getting to know you briefly, and wish you the best. Enjoy Hawaii.


Take care,


berry guy

See what I mean? Who uses the word "vaunted" in a random email? I just found it aggravating. Do I really care? No, not really - I am not interested in dating him or taking the effort to get to know him from afar, his attitude is off-putting, and he doesn't seem to be my type physically. Does this still bother me? Yeah, to an extent. I just don't understand the passive-aggressive thing. If we had met in person and dated a bit and I just blew him off, that would be one thing, but this was an Internet connection that never got past 4 or 5 emails so if it disappears, it disappears. Hell, one of the guys I went on two pretty good dates with from eharmony just never called me back, and did I call or email him with some passive aggressive crap? Nope. Nature of the online dating beast.

Which brings us back to why I quit eharmony.